Category: Faith
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Queer and Beloved
The last few years have taught me so much, and one of those very.important.things. has been coming to terms with the fact that I identify as queer. Something I’ve also realized is that I don’t owe anyone an explanation, or even the simple fact that Bi seems to be the label that fits the best.…
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Radical Acceptance
For most of my life I’ve thought I was broken. Something was off, and not quite right, and somehow I just didn’t meet the expectations of anyone around me. I remember as a toddler, crying to my mom, “I’m trying, Mommy. I’m really trying. I try SO HARD to be good.” Of course she showed…
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Signs
My soul likes to look for signs. Three days ago, under a robin egg sky, our yard burst with birdsong. Through the window I saw —one, two, three, four, five!— red-breasted robins perched in the trees, evenly spaced, like a sentry. The air was cold, but the sun shined brightly. Spring is near, I thought.…
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Growing Hope
The afternoon before Jacob is born, I trudge up the stairs to my bedroom to lay myself down. September sun filters through the window, casting shadows from the orange leaves of the tree onto my bed. As I crawl under the covers, I think, this is what hope feels like, and I exhale. I’ve been…
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Nourished
At the end of Jacob’s first week, I hobbled into my midwife’s office, bleeding and crying and snotting all over the place. She asked me how we were doing. “I’m bruised,” I said. “I’m bleeding. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Tell me I don’t have to do this, I begged her with my eyes.…
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Splinter
Jacob ran out the front screen door, exclaiming, “Christmas wreath!” in his two-year-old toddlerese. It was early December in Hawaii and the wreath I had picked up at the local Target was our lone Christmas decoration. With a deployed husband, two small children, and an upcoming holiday trip to my parents’ house on the mainland,…
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The Miracle of (im)Perfect Timing
Two kids under two was never part of my plan. My husband, whose sister is a mere 14 months his senior, assured me having kids close together would be not only good planning (get those hard years out of the way) but also a good investment in their friendship (he counts his sister and her…
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Waiting For My Missing Piece
The lizard was tiny and speckled brown, and it ran across the carpet of the new master bedroom as Jake and I played on the floor. Excited to show my toddler a creature he’d never met before, I pointed to it. “Look, Jakey! A little gecko!” With the speed and curiosity inherent to boys of his…
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The Last Thing I Wanted to Do
It rattles softly at the window like the fingers of a child as I sit on the edge of the tub to tie my shoes. It comes down the glass in crooked paths to stir my heart absurdly as it always has, and dear God in Heaven, the sound of it on the roof, on…
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I Can’t Live on Bread Alone
This week I reworked an old post from October 2013, which was shared on All In this morning. May it bring you hope, as it did for me, as I recalled the events of that fall. I am a bibliophile. I could spend all day in a bookstore, leafing through pages, inhaling that sweet aroma, running…
Erin Curlett 