Queer and Beloved

The last few years have taught me so much, and one of those very.important.things. has been coming to terms with the fact that I identify as queer.

Something I’ve also realized is that I don’t owe anyone an explanation, or even the simple fact that Bi seems to be the label that fits the best. But I have been wanting to be more open about it because I know I’m not alone.

I also know that many people think coming out as Bi is a way to test the waters before fully claiming an identity as a lesbian—and that’s fine, but it’s not me! I’m wildly attracted to my husband (if you really must know). He and I are more than good. He’s known about this exploration of identity for a while. My identity changes nothing about our marriage except that he knows me even better now. Now we can share in a part of who I am that has taken me a lifetime to see and welcome into the light. We chose each other, and still choose each other anew each day.

Turns out, being queer isn’t just about attraction or sex—it’s a whole way of being. Turns out, neurodivergence and queerness often intersect. Turns out, that feeling I always had about being different or odd or not quite fitting had more to do with our culture, with Christianity, with patriarchy, and with white supremacy, than with anything being *wrong* with me. Because I wasn’t born broken. I was born beloved: my brain AND my body.

I’ve been trying to figure out a way to talk about this publicly. Even though I am secure in the knowledge that I am loved and known and uniquely designed by the Creator of the universe, it still feels so.very.vulnerable. to share this truth.

Yet here I am. This is me. Beloved by God, and my husband, and whoever else will have me.

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